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| Reflections Catherine Al-Meten Meyers |
The lunar month is entering the period called the Dark of the Moon. It is the period of time just before the New Moon and the start of another lunar cycle. A new beginning that takes us further into the Autumn season. The cooler, longer nights require some changes in the way we dress, our patterns of sleep and work, and in how we arrange our homes. The further north you live, the more extreme the changes. What are some to the changes we might make in the next few days to prepare ourselves for a new cycle? How can we energize ourselves for a new season? Where are the places in our lives where energy is stuck, stale, or blocked? How can we generate a positive flow of Chi (energy, life force)?
Getting Started. Before you jump right in or run for the hills, take some time to notice what areas of your life are calling for attention. During the dark of the moon (the next few days before the New Moon in Libra on Friday), it's a good time to evaluate, assess, and ponder. Start where you are. By that I mean, don't do anything out of the ordinary to begin the process. Simply stop where you are right now, and notice. Notice your physical surroundings. And before you jump up to tackle the dishes or begin the laundry, I mean really notice how your surroundings feel to you. For example, recently I got a new bed, and since getting the bed, I have noticed how unpleasant it was for me to look out of my room into the messy bookcase in the corner of the living room. Each day for a week, it called for me to 'do something'. Without moving away from your cup of tea or coffee, I imagine you know which areas of your home need some kind of attention. Jot down a short list of the areas. Pick 4-5, no more. You don't want to overwhelm yourself at the get go.
Do an Assessment. Next, do a little walk about. Let yourself notice how the light is coming in the windows, and think about how the seasonal changes affect the different spaces in your home, office, or studio. On my walk about I notice the direct morning sunlight is about to disappear behind the slope of the hill behind my house. In a few more days, the sun will shine in the back of the house for only a few hours of the day until next Spring. Pay attention to the fluctuating temperatures over the next week or so, and remind yourself of what parts of the house need more heat and protection from the cold and damp. Also notice what items need to be stored or brought out of storage. Is it jacket or coat time yet? Where are your rain or snow boots and gear? Include your kitchen and pantry in the walk about. What foods are you less likely to be eating from now on, and what items do you need to stock up on for fall and winter? This is the time of the year I start making more soups. It's also time to pick apples and pears. Notice how your entry ways, mudrooms, or porches are organized. And also notice any areas that need fixing, cleaning, replacing, or clearing out.
You might also want to do a similar assessment of your own activities, goals, and life plans. What are you spending time doing, that you want to let go of? What would you like to do that you just haven't found time to do? What is feeding your soul? What is draining it? Include everything including the kinds of relationships you spend your time and energy in, the ways you use your free time, and the goals you've set (the ones you still want to do; the ones you are ready to let go). Look at your calendar or schedule, and see how much time you have allowed yourself for rest, exercise, recreation, sleep, service, quiet time, creative time, or time out in nature. Assess how balanced your life is, and without judging yourself, consider what you might want to change.
Make a Plan. For most of us, our activities and work change as the seasons change. Some of us return to work, others begin on new phases of their work, while others are making plans for trips in the off season. Whatever your life looks like in the Autumn, this is a great time to get all those 'good ideas' down into some kind of written plan. When we write down a plan of action, we relieve our minds of the pressure and stress of wondering what to do and when.
With chores related to organizing your home, office, studio, or yard/garden, select 4-5 tasks and determine their priority. Then guesstimate how long it would take to do each one. Then divide the task up and set time aside on your schedule to do the chore. Some of us like to do the whole task, others like to pick away at it. Whatever works for you, set a schedule to do it. It can be very simple. For example, I choose 10 minutes on Fridays to clean out my purse. And I choose one hour monthly to clean out the refrigerator. I may do it more often, but I make a habit of doing it at least according to my plan. And don't beat yourself up if you don't stick to the plan each time. Starting off with a plan, helps us establish some regular habits. Changing sheets on Sunday night, doing laundry on Mondays, or going produce shopping on Thursdays. When it becomes part of your routine, it seems less stressful. And it clears your mind of the stress of wondering when chores are going to get done.
Doing It in Littles.
A wise woman once suggested to me that I do things in littles. Even big tasks are easier to tackle when I break down the big chore into little parts. If cleaning up the whole house is your goal, start small. First clear the area by the entryway. Then do the dishes and clear all the counters and surfaces in the house. Next pick things up off the floor and clear corners. This last trick (getting things off the floor) is a recent discovery for me. It's akin to clearing surfaces. All these suggestions free up space and Chi/energy. Feng Shui principles are suggest that the kitchen is the hearth of the home, and it needs to be kept clear, clean, and free flowing. As hard as that might be, it is worth developing the habit of wiping off counters, clearing the sink of dishes, and of keeping the stove and refrigerator in good working order.
Whistle While You Work. How can we make the drudgery of housework less painful and exhausting? In the first place, at least for me, the thought attached to doing something I don't particularly enjoy is worse than the actual task itself. One thing to do, is when you think about a chore and wonder when you'll be able to make time to do it, take a few minutes to start. You might find that it takes a lot less time to simply do the work than to think about it all day.
Second, turn your attitude around. When you notice you're looking at an unpleasant task, find a way to make the task more pleasant. I use my dishwashing and pot scrubbing time into a meditative experience. I look out the kitchen window and watch the birds and trees and sky. I let the sunlight warm me as I wash away. Put on music, if that pleases you, or sing or whistle (like Snow White does with the animals helping). I'm not guaranteeing that a bunch of mice or squirrels will show up to help you, but putting your energy into something more uplifting cannot hurt, and in fact, will lift your spirits and raise your vibration. Use chores for time to pray or talk to the Divine, or work out problems or time to memorize a poem or two. Stick a poem you want to memorize up on the wall in front of where you are working, and pretty soon you'll have it committed to memory. Learning languages can be helped along by labeling the household items in whatever language you are learning. And there's always the reward system. When you've finished a task, reward yourself with a cup of tea, a short walk, a nap, or time to chat with a friend. We need to do what we can to free ourselves and our energy from fretting, stewing, and feeling overwhelmed about chores that need to be done.
Lighten Up. Let go of the idea that everything has to be perfect and you have to be the one to make it so. Lighten up. Some of us are a little too obsessed with getting things done. Begin appreciating what you've already accomplished. Before you make your list of things to do, make a list of what you've gotten done. Or pick up an old to-do list, and mark off what you've already done. Give yourself credit for getting as much done as you have. Especially for those of us who live alone, run our own businesses, or for some reason, end up feeling responsible for all the housework, give yourself a break from having to do everything by yourself. I have a couple of friends who work full time, have families, and are not feeling well. In order for them to get healthier, they need more time for themselves to heal and rest. It's particularly important that when we're ill, injured, or recovering from some major life issue, that we don't over do. Healing takes time and energy. Healing requires rest, exercise, and an easing up of stress. It's also a time when we need to get our priorities in order. Not everything is equally important. Got that? I'll repeat it in case you didn't get that this is essential to our health and well being. Not everything is equally important.
Ask for Help.You do not have to do everything yourself. Get help. Ask a friend to help you when she/he says, "Is there anything I can do to help?" Let them take the recycling to the thrift shop or let them help you organize a closet or move a piece of furniture. Spend a little bit of money hiring someone to come in to do some heavy house cleaning once a month. By spending $30-40 for a couple of hours you get some relief, and you help someone else earn their own living. For some people this is normal, but for many of us, we were raised or we convinced ourselves to think that we had to do it all. I've had to ask for help and get someone to come in to help me on several occasions in my life, and found it to be well worth any expense.
And if you have a family, they can help to. They may not do it as well as you do it, but they can help. You're teaching your own children and grandchildren to take responsibility along with other members of the family. Divide the chores up. There's no reason in this day and age that any one member of a family should be doing all the housework on top of everything else they do. Yes, I know, it's easier to use do it yourself, but you're really doing yourself and your children no favors in not expecting that they participate in keeping the home they live in in reasonable order. Make it fun. Set a timer, and have a pizza party afterward. Do whatever works for you, but don't think you have to do it all by yourself. And yes, I know it's hard to ask for help. But I would imagine there are people you know that would like to be able to do something to help you out, if only you would put your pride down and ask.
Another way to lighten your load is to get rid of having too much stuff around. Rid your space of extra everything. Dishes and cookware you never use. Use your favorite dinnerware, or make plans to rotate it throughout the year. If you never use it, give it to someone who will. Get rid of things that are broken and beyond repair. Get rid of clothes and shoes that you don't use or need. Give away furniture that is just taking up space. You know how to declutter by now. After all we've been brainwashed to thinking that's the be all and the end all. It's not necessarily, but decluttering can help rid our lives energy that is trapped in unused, broken, or outworn things, ways of being and thinking, and of our mental, emotional, and psychological energy. Remember how good it feels to release that which no longer belongs in your life. And this goes for the mental and emotional clutter as well. Have a good cry, get mad, make some grand gesture (break a plate or tear up a photo), and then move on. Life is too precious to waste wallowing in the pain of the past. You are too precious not to be waking up each day expecting to have a great day. Take time right now to figure out how you're going to enter this new season with a clear slate, open arms, and a semi-clean and clear office, home, car, studio, or desk. The important thing is to be happy doing what you're doing, and doing what is purposeful and healthy for you. Enjoy the energy of transforming your life as you move forward into the changes ahead.
